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Re: The Immortal

Subject: Re: The Immortal
by Vadon on 2009/4/18 6:16:17

Author's Note: I finished editing this next segment at 3:00 AM, so the odds are there are quite a few silly mistakes I'll try to edit out in the next couple days. A few of the jokes probably are only funny to me right now, but I guess we'll see? As it is right now, I'm happy with it. But that is prone to change after a goodnight's rest.

Anyway, without any further ado I give you the final segment of Chapter One.

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It didn't take long for Jacques to find his mark. The man was a trembling mass of muscles whose sheer size dwarfed the others in comparison. His face was a contorted mess of muscles, bulges of an ambiguous nature, and warts. The man's hair was a tangled, matted clutter that was generously splotched about his face in the most peculiar places. Sweat had glued a layer of soot and ash to his skin that no amount of washing could ever hope to cleanse. He was an ugly man, that was for certain. His looks couldn't be blamed on parental butterfingers; however, but his parents were to blame. The man was a half breed. Jacques couldn't tell whether the man was a half troll or giant, but he didn't much care. The thing that drew Jacques to the man—other than his size—was that the colossus would be naturally inhibited from any great intellect due to his genetic makeup.

Jacques took in a deep breath to puff his chest. He did this to try to make himself look more imposing, and it worked to a degree. He did, however, regret this action being as he had just inhaled the various fumes that this hodge-podge of ruffians expelled. Jacques stepped forward with confident strides. Although he wasn't intimidated by the hybrid—a perk of immortality—he did feel self-conscious about his appearance. His message would lose its edge if he seemed weak.

He finished his approach to the man and pointed dramatically at him.

“You, my humble sir, are the 'Chosen One!'” Jacques declared in a deep, rumbling voice. There was a thunderous shuffle as all the patrons in the bar turned to face Jacques and the hybrid.

The hybrid looked up from his drink slowly and examined Jacques. It took time for the hybrid to realize that Jacques was talking to him in particular, even with the little man's finger in his face. “Are, are you talkin' to me?”

“Why, of course! It was foretold many centuries ago that there would be a man who not a man, and a troll who was not a troll who would inhabit the same body. This combination of a man would be the champion of the world. You sir, are that man,” Jacques bellowed.

“But I'm not half-troll. I'm half-giant.”

Jacques' eye twitched.

“Why, I can't believe it!” Jacques exclaimed. He pulled out the small piece of parchment and slapped his forehead in a mocking show of disbelief. “I translated the prophecy incorrectly. It's not a half-troll, it's a half-giant! What an incredible intellect you must posses. No wonder your are the chosen one.”

“Who chose me?”

An inquisitive little weasel. Well... not so little. And the hybrid wasn't particularly weaselly either.

“That doesn't matter. What does matter is that you have a higher purpose, my lad, and it is time for you to fulfill your calling!”
“My calling?”
“Yes, your destiny!”
“How do you know I'm chosen one?”
“You have an... aura? One that is intangible but there nonetheless!” Jacques asserted. He quickly felt ashamed of himself for this statement, though, being as it was so fundamentally ludicrous that only an idiot would use that as their motivation to feel drawn to a person.

“I have aura? What is my aura?”

Jacques was surprised. Both that the hybrid would want to know the details of his aura as well as the fact that the hybrid knew what an aura was.

“When one looks upon you,” Jacques explained, “They can't help but notice your obvious physical prowess, your magnificent mind, your cherubic charm, and your glorious... gullibility?”

“Wow,” the hybrid whistled, “I'm all that?”

“Evidently on the last score,” Jacques muttered with a shrug.

The hybrid had become enthralled by Jacques' semi-eloquent fiction. He rested his elbows on the table and leaned forward. The poor, old surface creaked under the hybrid's weight.

“So,” he whispered, “What am I supposed to do?”

Jacques grinned, having now realized that the hybrid had taken the bait. Some of the patrons in the bar had realized that Jacques had pulled the hybrid into a scam, the others returned to their cups grunting little bits about how they couldn't wait until they were the chosen one.

“Well, the higher powers wouldn't want you to take their most sacred mission to begin with, now would they?”

The hybrid shook his head.

“Of course not! The prophecies detail some quests you must complete in order to prove your worthiness and capability.”

“Oh, I'm ready!”

“Then perhaps you would like to put that to the test?”

The hybrid nodded enthusiastically. Jacques feigned another smile and offered his hand for a shake. The hybrid grabbed Jacques' hand, whose relative size was about that of the hybrid's thumb and shook it with a zeal befitting a toddler.

“Shall we go, then?” Jacques inquired, gesturing towards the door.

The hybrid stood up from the table, stomped his way up next to Jacques, and the two men began walking toward the door. Jacques was only about half the hybrid's overall size, yet it was clear from their respective demeanors that Jacques was the one in control of this relationship.

“So what's your name, anyway?” Jacques asked the hybrid as he held open the door.

“Oh, my name? It's--”

The hybrid was cut short by an arrow embedding itself deep into his heart. The wound shocked the hybrid more than it hurt him, despite it being a mortal blow. The hybrid proceeded to face-plant into the street below; his fall was much like a tree dropping after the labors of a lumberjack. Jacques stared at his fallen minion in bewilderment. Jacques' jaw had slackened and his eyebrows scrunched into cluster in the center of his forehead.

“Aw, nuts.”

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@Eveleney and Enchantress: Thanks you, and I guess I met your request for more.

I'm not sure when I'll be starting the next chapter, it'll take me a few days as I figure out how to mesh it with the future plot line. I'm putting a tentative update deadline at Friday the 24th give or take a couple days.