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Re: Aveyond-Rhen's Quest (a parody of the whole AV1 story)

Subject: Re: Aveyond-Rhen's Quest (a parody of the whole AV1 story)
by TrueShadow on 2009/8/21 1:47:03

No response?

What the...? *shakes hand angrily*

Chapter 9: The Northern Isle

Somewhere near the coast of the Eastern Isle

Rhen: So, the Oracle say we need to go to the Sun Shrine. Where is it again?
Lars: It is located in the Mists in the Northern Isles.
Rhen: And how do we travel there?
Talia: You kids spend way too much time talking! Do more, talk less!
Rhen: You're one to say. Do you have any idea how to go there?
Talia: The answer is right in front of you! Robot boy, transform into a giant mecha and take us there!
Lars: I am incapable of doing that.
Talia: YOU CAN'T? Man, you're a low quality robot!
Lars: I am not a robot.
Talia: Yes, you are. You speak like a robot, looks like a robot, and does things like a robot. Therefore, you are a robot.
Lars: I AM NOT. I DO NOT HAVE GUNS ON MY FINGERS AND I CANNOT KILL SHADOWS AND I DO NOT HAVE PALLADION AS A PERSONA.
Rhen: ARGH! Shut up, you two! Lars, you can use Gate, right? Use that to take use to the northern isle!
Lars: I cannot do that. It will only take us to another dimension.
Rhen: So you can send things to another dimension, which is supposed to be very energy consuming, but you can't take us to another island?
Lars: Dimension magic is not so magic-consuming. Where did you learn that from?
Rhen: XXXholic and Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles.
Talia: You damn kid needs to watch less manga and animes.
Person: Umm, excuse me.
Everyone: *in an angry tone* YES?!
Person: Err, if you want to go to the Northern Isle, we can take you there.
Rhen: How so?
Person: Look around you.

The party looked around and realizes, they were in a harbor all along.

Talia: So, HOW COME NONE OF YOU DUMB KIDS REALIZES IT??
Rhen: Don't ask me! Lars, shouldn't you be able to detect??
Lars: Your presence alone is disturbing the work of my sensors.
Rhen: So you're saying it's MY fault??
Talia: No, it's BOTH OF YOU!
Rhen & Lars: YOU, TOO!
*the group gets into a fight*

A while later

Boatman: You want me to take you to the northern isle?
Rhen: *huffing* yes, please.
Boatman: You guys looks so worn up. What happened?
Talia: *huffing* Don't ask about that...
Boatman: Er, Okay.

And so they goes to the Northern Isle.

Northern Isle

Rhen: What's this? Brrr, I..m free...zing.
Lars: ...
Rhen: Lars, Brr, what's...wrong?
Lars: ...
Talia: Seems like he can't function properly due to the cold.
Rhen: So, brrr...what...should...brrr...we...do..?
Talia: This. *cracks knuckles* HIIYYAA!! *slaps Lars 100 times AT HIGH SPEED*
Rhen: Wow.
Lars: RECEIVING SHOCK. DANGER DETECTED. ACTIVATING EMERGENCY MODE.
Talia: See?
Lars: ENEMY DETECTED. PREPARING ATTACK.
Talia: Wait, enemy? That's not me, right?
Lars: I'ma chargin' mah lazer.
Talia: Wait, wait, wait!
Lars: *shoots huge laser beams*

BOOOOOOOOMMMMM

Talia: AAAAHHHHH!!!!
Rhen: .....Are we gonna be alright?

Brumwich

Rhen: At last, a city. Nowwe can treat your wounds, Talia.
Talia: *all black and burnt* Yeah, right.
Lars: Would you like to elaborate on what was happening while I was shut down?
Talia: *glares at Lars*
Rhen: You better not ask that, Lars.

Suddenly they heard dwarfs chatting.

Dwarf 1: It happened again.
Dwarf 2: ..The earthquake.
Dwarf 1: When are they gonna stop?
Dwarf 2: Sheesh, I'm tired already of these earthquakes and blizzards.
Rhen: They know the cause of the blizzards? Excuse me, mind telling us about that?
Dwarf 1: Oh, you see, the Mountain King and the Snow Queen is fighting again.
Dwarf 2: Yeah, the King sends earthquakes and the Queen sends blizzards to scare each other off.
Rhen: Do you know what caused that?
Dwarf 1: No idea. And that last earthquake was stronger than usual.
Dwarf 2: Yes, and I saw some strange lights and an explosion. Wonder what that could be.
Rhen:...
Talia:...
Lars: What is it??
Rhen: Er, thank you for the information, friends. Oh, and the last one, do you know where this King and Queen lives?
Dwarf 1: The King lives north of the village.The Queen usually lives with him, but since they're fighting, she moves to her palace.
Rhen: Thanks, bye.

Sorry if it's a bit lame and corny