Hey people,

I just realize that you can't really express your opinion regarding a topic that might be posted, if your not part of that particular 'club'. So, I just want to state my opinion on this one topic. Feel free to use this thread for expressing opinions on anything in the future; that is if it isn't deleted.

Hopefully, I'm not breaking any rules. (fingers crossed X)

Cheers!

Topic: Should parents be responsible for the actions of their children?
Presented by: The Debate Club

My Opinion:
Yes, I believe parents should be responsible for the actions of their children but to a certain extent and at certain degrees. I believe that just like any other relationship in life, the parent(s)-child/children dynamic is similar -I'll expand on this a little bit later.
Let's begin with why parents are called parents. It's because they have a job and responsibility to raise and teach their children.
For this reason, because there are stages in children's growth, learning capabilities and so forth. I believe it's appropriate to say that there are different stages of parenting and logically, of responsibility (within the dynamic).
When they're a baby, obviously 100% of the responsibility is on the parents, since they have no understanding or ability to survive on their own. As, they grow older, from ages 1 through 9, the responsibility on parents for their children should decrease gradually from 100% to 75%, thereby shifting 25% on the child; obviously these changes would occur slowly through ages 1-9 as well as take place sparingly - hopefully, where each time they take more and more responsibility.
By the age of 10-14, kids want to test the waters. They begin to have an awareness of things and begin to coherently and increasingly remember events, places, etc, taken place in the past which wasn't so before. This, also is accompanied by the ever-nagging feeling of wanting to do things on their own. Not so easy for parents to teach and raise their kids now. Here, is where I believe the beginning changes occur within the parent-child dynamic towards becoming similar to any other relationship in life; although, proceeding with caution, I have to emphasize that by no means does this mean that the kids have the right to do what they want. Definitely NOT. Again, this is another stage in children's growth. Parenting styles change and so should the responsibility. It's only logical for it to adjust as the relationship shifts from all dependent to semi-dependent/ partially-independent. So, if kids want to do something bad, which parents warn them not to do, but they do it anyway and cry about it. It's the parents responsibility to assess with their child of their actions and then guide them to make better ones in the future. However, the actions of the child are all her/his own because by this stage, the child is pretty much educated to make good decisions in the first place. They just simply act without thinking. So, yes parents still have responsibility for their children's actions but only to teach them how to go about the repercussions following the child's actions/decisions. However, by the age 15 to 17, the last stages before proceeding to young Adultville (lol), the responsibility should be shifting towards 50 - 75% on the children's part. I say this because, they are no longer children so-to-speak, they are grown people with opinions, personalities, their own minds, morals, etc. Thus, they should rightfully take most (if not all) of their responsibility for themselves, off their parents. (did that make sense? i hope so, anyway...) Mind, you that a lot of personal growth happens during this time and so the support and guidance from parents are usually needed and essential for their children's progress to advance. (erm, sorry but I don't mean for it to sound like a guide for a game...=/) So, parents do have responsibility over their children but not for their children's actions.

Take this for example (it's taking it to the extreme):
Let's say you believed you raised your child well and he/she grew up to be a really good kid, graduated and got a decent job. Then, out of no where your child commits murder or something illegal. So now, he/she's in court. Does that mean the judge would pronounce you (the parent) guilty for the crime that your child committed? No.

Like I said... Parents are responsible for their kids' actions in degrees always according to their kids' stage in life, in variations and depending on the situation.
I know, I know. Life doesn't always pan out as ideally as I'm criticizing it but, essentially, I believe this is what it boils down to...
Kids need boundaries, Parents shouldn't coddle all the time. Kids need to learn for themselves, Parents need to guide and teach them.
Just like you can't change someone's mind about something unless they have an open mind. It's difficult to make kids learn something by telling them not to do something. By all means though, take every preventative measure to stop your kids from doing something bad. I'm not saying you shouldn't, because you should.
In the end, responsibility is sure to land in its proper place; meaning Parents aren't at fault, sometimes neither are the children. It’s simply, an on-going battle of becoming a better person and clearly (before getting off topic) accepting responsibility, which tends to occur when a person accepts who she/he is.

There's my two cents. Agree or disagree. It's simply an opinion. Makes sense or no sense....it's all okay with me
Cheers!

P.S. no resources used…except for my analytical mind, personal observations, experiences and arcane insight (okay, maybe not the last bit ).

I'm sorry that you feel you cant post unless your part of the group. but the fact is, you ARE part of the group. the Village Square forum is open for everyone, and the only way people are going to get to know you in a "group" is if you post. Its kinda like you jsut have to jump in and start talking, if you dont say anything in a forum, no one will know youre here. :\

My advice is to post this in the "should parents be responsable" thread and ask a mod to get rid of this. ;]

i tried that already and it went up but then i went back and it wasnt there anymore

this is part of the debate club, and a lot of effort has gone into setting it up and getting people involved.

I would advise that you check out the other topics in the Clubhouse and see if you are interested in taking part in future ones so your name can be put down, and let this debate run as it was intended. I don't know if there's a set time when the debate will be completed, but the organisers may be happy for other people to join in after that time, as all of the debates are probably going to be of interest to people who haven't listed their names.

I also see no reason why the debate itself can't remain in the Clubhouse - a bending of the "one thread per club" rule to become "one active thread per club".

are you talking about the topic(s)? you have to reply to an active ongoing discussion, once a topic "dies" it will float down to the bottom of the forum. when it does that it means people have lost interest in the topic, or theyve discussed everything already. so try to see if a topic is active or not.

after the debate is finished, i believe it will be locked...

s

but theyre talking about the open debates in the village, not the debate club... >_>

It is stated in the opening of the Debate Club post that at the end of the debate the thread will be open for all the community to discus and add their opinions, as well as vote for the team that most influenced them.. We only asked that you allow the debate teams to have a go first. This is a special situation. You are welcome to talk in any club, just don't go there to say you don't like what they are talking about. If you don't like a club, you don't have to go there.

@amitiel, I love what you have to contribute and you are welcome and encouraged to post it in the thread as soon as the poll goes up I'm not sure who removed it but if I had seen it first I would have asked you to save it till the end of the closed portion of the debate. The whole point of the debate club is to encourage calm participation in interesting topics. I'm really glad to see we sparked a desire to eagerly respond from you.

Thanks everyone for the info, sorry for the mishap. Clearly I need to read but, the topic just seem too good, so I kinda skipped it. Plus, I just recently joined and am a bit lacking in all of the protocols here. My apologies again. Like I said, I'm on a learning streak and clearly I'm learning fast!!! LOL
Cheers! Oracle, Nick, Shaz and Serendipity!!!

@amitiel09 - no worries, i think it's great that you want to join in on discussions...you had a lot of really great things to say...

erm...so does that mean we'll see you in the debate club?

s

lol...possibly Serendipity